Biographical Information


I do not drink or smoke.

I get questioned on this a lot. It's because I'm a control freak. Unlike most control freaks, however, I have become adept at limiting this tendency to my own actions. At any rate, I do not enjoy (and, in fact, tend to react violently to) the experience of being out of control of my own body. Alcohol also tastes bad and is just plain unhealthy. Nor do I drink anything that is caffeinated or carbonated, or eat fast food, or use medications that are not strictly necessary.

I do not drive.

Like every other American, I was brainwashed into thinking that I needed to be able to drive. I didn't want to drive, but I was told that it was necessary. The first time that I legally drove a car, I hit a tree in my own yard on a clear August evening with my father's six month old truck. Since then, people have been less motivated to teach me. I have thus learned to use public transportation, and I have saved tens of thousands of dollars that would have gone to terrorists and their oil companies.

I am physically active.

The outdoors and I get along quite well. At Northwestern, I earned a reputation for climbing trees. My RA used to call me Tree Man until he became horribly disfigured. In high school, I worked summers as a cub scout camp counselor, where I taught the fine arts of using a dull knife without hurting yourself, tying things up, and setting things on fire. I love to go camping, hiking, climbing, and canoeing, but I hate swimming. I like to ride my bike around town or on the trails in the park. I also play a lot of ping pong and billiards. In the winter, I like to go skiing, both downhill and cross country.

I am a nerd.



I am a minimalist.

I do not like to have possessions with little purpose or that require maintenance. I do not like to plan anything more than a day in advance. These things restrict my freedom to do what I want when I want, and they are an unnecessary burden. I do not like receiving gifts, for I have everything I need, and that is everything I want. I especially do not like events where there is an expectation that gifts will be exchanged.

I am a non-conformist.

I do not go out of my way to stand out from society, but you can bet that I won't make any effort to fit in unless it somehow serves me. It is my opinion that most people are stupid and unhealthy and that most of society's expectations are thus stupid and unhealthy. This weighs heavily on many of my decisions. As such, I'll put some frickin' pants on when I darn well please.

I am an introvert.

I dislike noise in all forms. I like my conversations to be succinct or at least content-driven, and I give information on a need to know basis. In particular, I do not like to be asked how I'm doing, what my favorite * is, or what I thought of something I've just witnessed. In all probability, I haven't formed an opinion, and I don't care enough to form one on the spot. I apply the same principles to rationing my time. Many of my highest priorities do not involve other people, and in many cases, people would only distract me. Thus, I am happiest when other people are not around.

I am an atheist.

Don't take this personally, but I consider the image of God, as conveyed by most popular religions, to be quite silly and a statistical impossibility. When forced to limit myself to pure deduction, however, I must admit that I can go no further than agnosticism. Despite this, I still believe that many of organized religion's practices are harmful and a threat to the human race.

I am a libertarian.

I believe that people should be allowed to do what they like, provided they allow others to do the same. I believe that, to a lesser extent, businesses are extensions of people. I believe that an economy is a means to a higher standard of living, not an end itself. I believe that the environment cannot be sacrificed at any cost. I believe that people are responsible for the consequences of their own actions, whether those consequences are intentional or not.